| 100% | SNARK | 5 | "'That's a great idea' is what I would have said if I had never heard an idea before in my life," e.g. |
| 33% | ALIBI | 5 | "I couldn't have robbed that bank, because I was at a crossword tournament," e.g. |
| 31% | GROUCHO | 7 | He said, "Those are my principles, and if you don't like them ... well, I have others" |
| 31% | NEO | 3 | "The Matrix" hero who said, "I don't like the idea that I'm not in control of my life" |
| 30% | VEST | 4 | Subject of a Mitch Hedberg joke that ends, "If I had no arms, it would be a jacket." |
| 29% | GEETHANKS | 9 | ... a tantrum / "Oh great, that's just what I needed" |
| 29% | YOUREMISSINGOUT | 15 | "That's a lost opportunity," and what can be said to the writer of four clues in this puzzle |
| 29% | TROPE | 5 | The idea that it was all a dream, in cinematic plot twists, e.g. |
| 28% | MASHA | 5 | The Seagull character who says, "I dress in black to match my life. I am unhappy." |
| 28% | ERMA | 4 | Bombeck who wrote If Life Is a Bowl of Cherries, What Am I Doing in the Pits? |
| 28% | NERO | 4 | Roman emperor who said before dying, "What an artist the world is losing in me!" |
| 28% | MARX | 4 | "Those are my principles, and if you don't like them ... well, I have others" quipper |
| 28% | MAE | 3 | West who said, "Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution" |
| 28% | ANGIE | 5 | Girl's name said twice in a Rolling Stones hit before "When will those clouds all disappear?" |
| 27% | BASKET | 6 | "Don't put all your eggs in the same ___," what an NBA player would say about a risky dunk? |
| 27% | SMITH | 5 | What would you call a "granny" apple that's green in color? |
| 27% | FIGHTINGWORDS | 13 | "Wanna take this outside?," e.g … or what are found four times in this puzzle's circled letters |
| 26% | HIFI | 4 | "If I had a ___" (lyric before "Madam, I'm Adam" in "Weird Al" Yankovic's "Bob") |
| 26% | ALIBI | 5 | "I couldn't have done the murder—I was at my son's Little League baseball game!", e.g. |
| 26% | CANT | 4 | "___ argue with that!" (what you may say after being presented with a great idea) |
| 26% | MEL | 3 | Brooks who wrote, “If I cut my finger, that’s tragedy. Comedy is if you walk into an open sewer and die” |
| 26% | OBAMA | 5 | Who said "Issues are never simple. One thing I'm proud of is that very rarely will you hear me simplify the issues" |
| 26% | SCAM | 4 | A call saying "We are trying to reach you about your car's extended warranty," e.g. |
| 26% | GUARDIANANGEL | 13 | *Clarence in "It's a Wonderful Life," e.g. [M.L.B.] |
| 25% | TED | 3 | Lasso who said, "If God would have wanted games to end in a tie, she wouldn't have invented numbers" |
| 25% | IRONY | 5 | A sign that says "No signs allowed," e.g. |
| 25% | LOSTMEDIA | 9 | Show that's been removed from streaming without a physical release, e.g. |
| 25% | IMO | 3 | "Here's my take on that ...," in a text |
| 25% | COUPLEOFBOORS | 13 | Two guys walk into a bar. One says, "___." Bartender says, "I can see that, but what'll ya have?" |
| 25% | DENIALS | 7 | "Wasn't me" and "I would never," e.g. |